"I should not talk so much about myself if there were any body else whom I knew as well."
-Henry David Thoreau

Thursday, July 17, 2014


I don't think I ever shared this photo.  It's a super cute sign that Aunt Becky got for us to hang on the back porch, since I like to say that our string lights make it look like a party on the porch all the time.  

This morning Drew and I were having our coffee on the back porch, enjoying these unseasonably cool temperatures.  The sunrise was pink & purple.  I really wish the camera could capture the true colors and awesomeness, but if it could then personally witnessing such a sunrise wouldn't be as powerful.  

Drew and I are making real efforts to eat better.  We've started grocery shopping together on Sunday afternoons and I'm finding that making those decisions and purchases together keeps us both invested in what we eat.  My favorite treat this week is strawberries, blueberries and peaches.  Nothing added, just fresh & yummy fruit.  I cut it all up, tossed it and then put it in 1 cup sized containers so that it's simple to pack in Drew's lunch in the mornings or to grab a snack for myself during the day.  Isn't it pretty?  

For two years we have periodically gotten mail from the children's hospital (since that's where Emma died) and now we get it from Circle of Life Hospice (since Alex was accepted into the program before she died).   I would say that 99% of the time I appreciate the effort, but don't find the slightest comfort in the cards or letters.  Actually, sometimes the notes even annoy me.  Today we got a letter that happened to say exactly what I needed to hear.  

I'm guessing that there is no way you can read all of that, so I'm going to share part of it with you.  Perhaps there is someone else out there that can benefit from such advice and encouragement.  

"It has been a few months since your loss and your initial feelings of loss have lessened some.  Even though six or more months have passed you may still experience periods of increased stress and may not know if this is 'normal'.  Each person experiences a loss differently in their own way and under their own timeframe.  
The following suggestions may help you cope with stressful situations when they arise.  
-You can be intentional about taking good care of yourself.  
-You can choose to be among people you enjoy and avoid those who sap your energy.  
-Find people who you can openly share your feelings with, including tears!!  
-Do the things you want to; avoid trying to 'please' others.  Focus on yourself.  
-You can actively take charge of your grief, honor it, and use support to help you walk through it." 

I have someone dear to me who has pretty well told me these exact things in the last week or two.  She's pretty smart :-)  This letter is not targeted toward Drew & I because we lost a child, it is a general letter for anyone who lost a loved one.  I just wanted to share it with you all on the off chance that you could use these reminders.  

1 comment:

Becky Hogan said...

Soooo glad you like the sign!!! I'll plan a trip to NW Ark so we
can really "party on the porch!"
Aunt Becky