"I should not talk so much about myself if there were any body else whom I knew as well."
-Henry David Thoreau

Friday, October 10, 2014

Firing

On Wednesday I was supposed to meet Cheryl in the morning to walk, but it was raining.  She said we could either workout inside or I could go back to bed.  Guess what I chose?  Bed.  That was dumb, because I was already up and I didn't have time for a real nap before picking up Grandpa in a couple of hours.  All day long I beat myself up for having ducked out of exercise with my friend.  I did go ahead and mow the yard and work outside that afternoon, so I got in my activity, but I still felt bad enough that I was determined to keep our workout date today.  Getting out of bed was no easy task while the rain poured outside, but I did it.  I just got home from her house, where we did intervals between the elliptical and strength training (or, as I like to think of it, catching my breath from the elliptical).  My point... I've gotten a good rush of adrenaline, which is my absolute favorite thing about exercise, and now my brain is firing on all cylinders and I feel pumped instead of like taking a nap.  You know what that means?  Of course, you do.  It means I've put myself in front of the computer to write.
I saw a post on Facebook yesterday that explained introverts quite well.  I very much consider myself an introvert, but I don't think for a moment that you can put us all into one category.  We all require our own balance in life.  That being said, I think that many people will relate to this.  Click this LINK, it's worth it.
Did you do it?
I'll trust that you did and continue.
I feel like this 99.9% of the time.  The part I like was about getting vs giving energy.  I gain my energy in my own little bubble.  I do love my friends and family and new experiences, but sometimes it's exhausting and I often find myself needing time (sometimes days) to recover from big social things.  The tip on how to deal with an introvert?  Spot on.  My favorite people are the ones who can be in my home and not need to be entertained.  If you are comfortable taking your shoes off, putting your feet on the coffee table, helping yourself to the refrigerator and just 'being' then you are my favorite person.  For me, part of being a socially successful introvert is being able to express those things to the people in my life.  The most important person in my life is Drew and some years ago we realized that it was perfectly acceptable to say, "Can we just sit and not talk tonight?"  or... "You watch your show, I'll read my book and we will be together without DOING anything."  There's comfort and recharging in that.  For sure.  Honestly, I think it's funny that people think I'm comfortable in big situations.  For example, Happy Like This.  I absolutely, 100%, believed in the mission and that was all that made it worth the publicity.  Fundraisers?  I can't think of anything less fun.  Oh wait, put me in front of hundreds of people at the fundraiser and make me speak.  Yep, that's less fun.  I can do it, but it stresses me out saps my energy.  Don't mistake my use of the word stress as something purely negative.  There is good stress, too.  HLT was good stress.  Being a mom was good stress.  There are tons of good stresses in the world and they are absolutely worth it, but for an introvert it isn't always invigorating, it's sometimes exhausting.
Okay, I'm not sure if I'm done with that thought, but my mind has moved on.  (So, perhaps I'm an introvert and ADD?)  Bringing up HLT made me think of something that I've been meaning to share with you all.  Of course, you know that I made the decision to dissolve HLT at the beginning of the year.  I'm very happy with what we were able to do in just a few years and I'm not sad that we didn't take it further.  Here's why... we are going to do it anyway.  We have done it.  A few of you gave us money after Alex died.  We used it to ship Alex's leftover Pediasure to a little girl across the  country whose insurance wouldn't pay for all she needed.  We gave all the equipment we had to others who could distribute it to kiddos who needed it.  Now fall is here and Christmas isn't too far off.  Drew & I have decided that we are going to make sure that each child at Friendship (the facility where Alex & Emma received their therapies) will have a Christmas gift this year.  HLT did this the last two years and I'm so glad that we did.  Some of those kiddos will have full Christmases at home, but some won't.  All of these kids are super special kiddos with needs all their own.  The workers at Friendship spend their days caring for & teaching these children and their families face issues every day that Drew & I faced for years.  Our goal, as in years past with Happy Like This, is to make sure that at the yearly Christmas program, after the kids perform for their families, that Santa has a gift for each child.  Not a generic gift from the dollar store, but a special gift that was picked just for them.  I'm sharing this with you as an invitation to join us.  I estimate that we will need at least $1,000 just to spend $10 on each child.  If we open the options a bit more ($10-$20 each) then that cost could be anywhere between $1,000 and $2,000.  Let me tell you again why this is worth it.  The years that we spent at Friendship grew more than just my girls, it grew relationships with some amazing people that I hold very dear.  The women that spend their days with these special kiddos are awesome and they know these children.  We won't be going to the store just to spend a bunch of money and have something to wrap.  We will, just as we did last year, go with a list of specific names and specific things that each child needs and/or wants.  They know what is appropriate for each individual and we will choose a gift specifically for them.  So, let me officially extend the offer to you.  As you are planning your Christmas budgets, maybe you could include at bit for this.  Perhaps you are someone who would have spent a few dollars on my girls in the past?  Would you consider giving Alex & Emma's gift to another special child?  You won't get a tax write off and you won't have the thrill of watching any of these children open their gift.  What you will have is part of my heart and the full knowledge that you made a very special child smile.  You will know that somewhere there is a parent or teacher or therapist that loves that child so much that they consider it a gift to themselves to see that child's smile.
I've just realized that there is a tear in my eye.  I suppose that's just a glimmer of how much this means to me.  Please don't feel like I'm cornering any of you into this.  I simply wanted to share what our intentions are and extend the invitation to anyone who would like to help.  I'm going to say that we will do the shopping around the first of December, so that's less than two months away.  I think you all know where to find me, should you want to help.  Just in case... adh957@yahoo.com

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